What Is That Noise?

What is that noise? That was my question today when I was in the downstairs powder room. Now I am generally on the ball and pretty good at distinguishing noises in my environment; but not in the morning and definitely not this morning. (I am good for nothing in the morning really and as a safety precaution should be given wide berth.) 

Anyway, the noise sounded like the toilet was running. So I took the lid off of the back of the toilet and looked inside and nothing. I did a test flush and nothing. Hmmmm, I looked around the room and in the kitchen and by God there was that noise; still going on and on and on….woosh, woosh, woosh. So I ran downstairs and looked all around the basement and I could hear it still….OMG where is that noise coming from??? 

Ackkkk screw the noise I had to get to an appointment and I couldn’t be late for it let alone miss it. As I left the house I took comfort in knowing that at least there was no flooding anywhere in the house. I engaged in some happy magical thinking that it was the sound of ice and snow melting outside…fast, really fast moving melting, in freezing temperatures because that could happen maybe somehow…. and I went on my way.

I came home and totally forgot about the noise and went about my way for 5 hours plus. About 3:30 I went back into the powder room and OMG! THAT NOISE! OMG! I had forgotten about the noise. It was still there. I said a few colorful expletives about my memory, home ownership and life in general because a loud watery noise continuing throughout the day well…nothing good could come of that.

Now that it was afternoon and I had my wits about me and the ability to engage in deductive reasoning, I had an epiphany and decided that noise was coming from the back yard. So off I trundled onto the back porch to see if perhaps my hunch was correct. Ummmmm yep. The outside pipe to the hose had cracked and was spraying like a parisian fountain.

After a moment of sheer panic, which was odd it wasn’t like this was a life threatening event; I of course thought plumber, I need a plumber. Then I thought no no, I need to shut the water off to the pipe. However seeing that most of my choices today were untimely and obviously wrong I decided to call Ed as he is my sanity litmus test (God love him). He agreed that turning off the water main to the outside pipe was indeed a prudent solution. After a meeting of minds (Ed and I) it was decided to wait until spring to have the outside hose pipe fixed as why chance having it break again this winter. Next fall I will turn the water main to the hose pipe off, I hope, if I remember…see this is why I am not a brain surgeon, because if I was there would be a lot of people out there walking sideways and drooling while watery noises play in the background.



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